In a post we wrote before, we talked about how some of the signs of depression or anxiety can be physical. In this post, I’d like to try to think about this a little deeper. What I mean is how does physical pain make emotional pain worse and vice versa.
Here are some examples: Continue reading Pain breeds pain
Before you read this post, remember that what is below might not apply to everyone – it is important for your child to always discuss medication decisions with your doctor. Every situation is unique.
If your child takes medications for depression or anxiety and they are feeling much better, you might want to know if they can stop their medications cold turkey.
Not a good idea, and let me explain why.
Stopping cold turkey can jolt your body and will likely result in withdrawal symptoms such as flu-like symptoms, headache, and muscle spasms. Continue reading How long to take medications
Human beings all crave to belong. We want to have friendships that support us and make us feel good. However, when we start to feel no longer wanted by others, we experience the weight of loneliness and isolation. This is especially true with adolescents. A recent article about bullying behaviors connected these negative behaviors to feelings of not belonging.
In the past, we posted an article that looked into more detailed differences between various healthcare professionals. This article is a spin off from that one by providing some tips on how to decide who the best healthcare professional for your child might be and how to find one nearby.
How do I find the right healthcare professional for my child?
This is a tricky question that can have a lot of correct answers. Remember that you and your child are the expert in your family’s needs so listening to your intuition and asking yourself real questions is a great place to start. The steps below are guidelines for navigating the system and may not be the best fit for everyone.
Recently one of our team members wrote an article entitled, “What do all of these letters mean?” This article provided a brief overview of the post-nominal letters (those initials after someone’s name) we so often see while navigating the health world. Some of you asked for more information (thank you for your input!), so now we are delivering. This post reviews the details about certain health professionals. Review the image below which highlights some of the main points regrading education, medication, and therapy.
Continue reading What Do All Of These Letters Mean: A more detailed look
So first of all, what is co-rumination? Co-rumination is discussing problems with others (in this case, your child) frequently, repeatedly, and excessively while never achieving a solution to fixing the problem.
Although co-rumination can be helpful at times by providing emotional support, it is not a productive form of communication because it does not allow for coping skills to develop which can hinder recovery.
You can think about it almost like a bug bite. The more you scratch, the itchier and redder it becomes. However, if you apply ointment and refrain from touching it, the bug bite begins to disappear.
A recent study found that adolescents with depression get into the habit of co-ruminating with their friends and their parents more than people who do not have depression. But with parents – as opposed to friends – they were more likely to have conversations about solving the problem.
So what does this mean for me? When talking with your child about problems occurring in their life, it is important not only to show your emotional support for them but also to help them to think of ways they might solve the issue. Sometimes when you hear your child talk about something that is upsetting them, it might cause you to feel anxious or worried for them. Before thinking about what you are saying you might blurt out something like, “You’re right! That teacher is no good!” or “You keep getting these headaches all the time – what the heck is going on with you?” This might in turn make your child feel more anxious – which makes you feel more anxious – and you get the picture. Try to instead name their emotion and your emotion. And then move on to asking them if they can think of any possible solutions. Try something like, “Wow that is really frustrating about your teacher. Can we sit down and map out exactly what happened and think about what you might have done differently?” or “Ok these headaches are happening a lot. Let’s make an appointment with your doctor, and before you go try to write down everything you can about your headaches so we are prepared to talk about it.”
By talking with your child about ways to overcome the barriers in their life, your child will begin to develop the necessary problem-solving skills they will need long term so they can pull them out as a skill they have even when you are not around. If this is working, you might start to get less “freak out” texts! Instead of agitating the “bug bite”, help your child find a solution to the problem they are experiencing so they can build the skills they need for future problems.
Have you felt like you have co-ruminated with your child before? What happened and what do you think you could do differently?
A few of the comments from young people on our adolescent site mention that looking back, some of them wish they would have opened up more with a therapist. Has your child expressed their worries about opening up? This is very common.
Some people may worry about:
Of course these are all valid concerns. Some things that may help is remembering that a therapist’s job is to listen to people’s thoughts and about intimate details of their lives. This means that probably what you are telling them is a version of something they have heard before or at least something they have training in.
A therapist’s role includes:
If your child is getting therapy and feels they cannot open up enough with their therapist, it is important for them to be honest. Your or your child can let the therapist know they are having a hard time opening up and sharing. This is something the therapist can work on with your child! Also if it’s not a right fit, its ok to tell them that too.
Has your child had trouble opening up to a therapist? Are there ways they overcame this?
If you are told your child may have a mental illness, you might fast forward their lives to pictures of other family members (or even yourself) who have struggled with mental illness. Mental illness is common and many of us have been affected ourselves or have affected family. Especially if family members have not received treatment it can be tough to watch them struggle. Maybe they are someone you enjoy spending time with sometimes, but other times you feel let down because they neglect you or hurt your feelings. Having a mental illness that is not treated often means you are not doing things to be good to yourself – and if you’re not being good to yourself, it is hard to cultivate quality relationships with others.
Because of this, being told your child may have a mental illness can cause anxiety because you are predicting their life will be a struggle and that is not something you want for them. It’s understandable that you might worry or be upset. But then take some time to think about it a little more. It’s true that mental illness can run in families, yet every person is unique and it affects each person in a different way. Also, we are learning more and more about treating mental illness. Some of our older family members maybe did not receive enough treatment when they were younger, and we know getting treatment when you are younger helps more.
If you feel this way, remember we are like our family and then we are not like our family. Focus on yourself and your child. Sometimes when we do that, others notice and in time, help themselves as well.
Have you experienced worries your child’s life would be similar to a family member’s who struggles with mental illness? How did you cope with these concerns?
I was so ready to graduate from high school! I had been accepted to my dream college and I wanted to move away from home, meet new people, and start fresh. High school had been pretty rough. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder my junior year and I struggled to understand the illness, how to manage it, and how to explain it to other people. People who have bipolar disorder struggle with bouts of extreme energy and euphoria and then dark depressive episodes. The depressive episodes wiped out my motivation and made me feel hopeless and worthless. I was a good student, I belonged to a lot of clubs, I played sports, and I had wonderful friends but when I was depressed I had no energy to do any of these things. Depression made me feel so lost and defeated that I forgot who I was. I felt like all I had was my depression. I really wanted to go to college because I thought everything would be different. I honestly thought I could leave my bipolar disorder and my depression behind me.
Continue reading If I don’t talk about it, maybe it will go away
You may have seen them before while navigating the mental health world…MD, LPC, MFT, LCSW, PhD…what do they all mean?!
Here is a very brief introduction to what some of these different letter stand for and what they might mean to you.
Social Workers: Social workers can have a wide range of specialties and skills, and the term social worker can refer to a volunteer with a little experience up to a clinical social worker with years of practice. When receiving therapy from a social worker you want someone with a Masters in Social Work (MSW) who has a license to do therapy which could be a Licensed Social Worker (LSW) or Licensed Clinical Social worker (LCSW). Social workers are often members of the National Association of Social Workers, where you can find more information on the professional and search for clinicians.
Counselors and Therapists: This is a wide term that can encompass many different specialties and background. One of these titles is Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC). This title includes someone who got a master’s degree in Psychology, Counseling, Mental Health Counseling, Human Services, or a similar field, and have a certain number of supervised practice hours. Marriage and Family Therapists (MFT) is another title you may see, which just means the counselor specializes in marriage and family therapy. The titles let you know that these counselors have the appropriate education and post-education training.
Psychologists: A psychologist will have a doctorate degree and will always have the letters PhD or PsyD after their name which means they are licensed to practice. Well it’s not uncommon to see a psychologist for talk therapy, they are especially skilled in testing and diagnosing. You may be referred by a Social Worker or Counselor to a Psychologist for a one-time test or assessment. It is common for a psychologist to have an LPC after their name as well as the PhD or Psyd.
Psychiatrists: Psychiatrists are doctors (MDs) who went to medical school and did their residency with a mental health or psychiatry focus. Psychiatrists are able to prescribe medication, and are often referred by one of the other mental health professionals. It is unlikely you would ever find a psychiatrist to receive talk therapy from weekly, and psychiatrists may or may not be trained in therapy. It’s common to be referred to a psychiatrist after seeing one of the other professions first.
Have you wondered what all these letters meant? Was this brief overview helpful? Let us know in the comments!
